I’ll be honest with you, when I first hear the word meditation, I immediately think of someone sitting down, crisscross applesauce, on the floor, with their hands on the knees, closing their eyes, and probably humming.
But that’s not at all what meditation really is. Many times we think, oh, no, I can’t do meditation because it’s supposed to look a certain way (and it looks weird). Or it’s for a certain group of people.
But meditation is something that I have learned through my guest, Kelly, that has so many benefits and looks different for different people. My biggest takeaway from Kelly is that meditation helps me to realize that my thoughts are just thoughts.
A lot of times we think that the thoughts that pop into our mind are actual truth. In reality, it’s not. Many times its just little things firing off in your brain. It’s not necessarily true. Plus, meditation helps you be more productive. Ready to find out how? Check out the full episode to learn more.
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About Kelly
Kelly Smith is a globally renowned yoga and meditation teacher, E-RYT 500 /YACEP, founder of Yoga For You, and host of the chart-topping Mindful in Minutes podcast and its spin-off, Meditation Mama. Yoga for You, a location independent yoga and meditation school that has served thousands of students located all through the US, Canada, and the UK. Kelly specializes in the non physical limbs of yoga and is best known for her master trainings and workshops in meditation, restorative yoga, and yoga nidra, as well as her international yoga and mindfulness retreats.
Connect with Kelly
Website: www.yogaforyouonline.com
Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/yogaforyouonline
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/yogaforyouonline/
Podcast: Mindful in Minutes
Podcast: Meditation Mama (prenatal meditation podcast)
Free 7-day Meditation Challenge: https://www.yogaforyouonline.com/free-7-day-meditation-challenge
Links Mentioned in this Episode
- Website: www.yogaforyouonline.com
- Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/yogaforyouonline
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/yogaforyouonline/
- Podcast: Mindful in Minutes
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Transcript of this episode
Toni-Ann Mayembe 0:05
You are listening to the weekly podcast, inspiration, encouragement, Practical Tips. My name is Tony, and you are listening to Episode 173. Super excited to be back here with you. I know last month, I didn’t have any new content coming out. But we had to replace going, a girl needed a break. And thank you for being patient with me. Thank you for understanding and returning back for some more awesome, awesome interviews and conversations here on the podcast. Just a quick update to the course is still going on. I really almost had a little mini breakdown because I thought, Okay, I got through block two, just started Blackberry. And I was like, okay, good. I’m caught up now. Like, I can handle this. And then I look in the course load is like twice as much as what it was before. So I wanted to cry, but I’m okay, I got a plan, and we’re gonna get things done. Don’t worry, we’ll be celebrating. Once this is all over September 8 is the day when I’ll be completely done with this course in you will see so much more on the podcast and on. On line period, like from real happy mom, like, I really haven’t been able to do a lot of the things that I have planned. But I’m working things out. And I want to let you know that we’re making progress. So with the course there’s five blocks in the course, I have completed block one and two, I started block three. I’ll let you know how that goes. All right. Again, thank you so much for being patient with me during the month of March. This week, I’m super excited to have this episode, go live for you only because today we’re talking about meditation, let me just throw that out there. I have my guest Kelly on in Kelly is so awesome and so amazing. She really makes it so simple when it comes to meditation. And I’ll be honest with you, when I first hear the word meditation, I immediately, you know, think of someone who’s like sitting, you know, crisscross applesauce, on the floor, with their hands on the knees, closing their eyes, and probably humming. But it’s not that meditation looks and feels like so many different things. And a lot of times I think, we think like, oh, no, I can’t do meditation because you think it’s supposed to look a certain way. Or it’s for a certain group of people, or whatever the case is. But meditation is something that I have learned through Kelly, that has so many benefits. And the biggest one that I’ve taken away from her from this episode is that meditation helps me to realize that my thoughts are just that they’re just thoughts. And a lot of times we think that the thoughts that pop into our mind are actual truth. In reality, it’s not. Sometimes it is, but a lot of times, it’s just little things firing off in your brain. It’s not necessarily any truth to it, and just acknowledging that they’re just thoughts in another big one, especially here on the podcast, and we talk a lot about productivity. And time management is it actually helps you to be more productive. I know. Yeah, it helps you be more productive. So meditation is something that I really am opening up to, and starting to do a lot more, just because I’m starting to see the benefits of it after this conversation that I’ve had with Kelly. So I’m super pumped to share this episode with you. I know you’re gonna enjoy it a lot. Make sure you listen to the end because in the end, there’s something special there. So you got to find out what it is. And yeah, I’m not going to give away too much more. But before we jump into the episode, I wanted to share something new that I have started. I have started a real happy mom. I want to say yeah, it’s merch we’re happy my merch is what it is. So I’ve created just a few designs for some T shirts and other other things that you can have these designs on whether it be on pillows, totes, phone cases, whatever the case is like real happy mom now has merch and I want you to check it out. There will be some sales and things that will be going on and off I’ll try to let you know when the sales are going on but I believe there’s nothing going on right now. I just really want you to go over and check it out. I got some cute designs that I wanted to share with you and hopefully if yellow I get you a grab something
Toni-Ann Mayembe 4:52
and yeah rock the girl mom boy mom or or the mama shirt that we got going on over here on the road. Be my merch site. So if you want to check this out, and I know you do, because you love me and I love you, I want you to head on over to Real happiness, comm slash merch, M Erca. We’re happy mom.com/merch And you’ll be able to see the designs there. Definitely, the link will be in the description and in the show notes. And I would love for you to go check it out. Let me know what you think. And if there’s anything else that you want to see in there, somebody messaged and let me know like, hey, Toni-Ann It’d be nice if you did something like this. And we’ll see we can get that up for you. Alright, now that we have all of that out of the way, let’s go ahead and jump on into this week’s episode. So I have my guest Kelly on the podcast today. Super excited to have you, Kelly, welcome to the podcast.
Kelly 5:51
Thank you so much for having me. I’m really excited for this. Yes,
Toni-Ann Mayembe 5:54
I’m super pumped to talk to you. We were just talking before I hit record, and we were talking about meditation and how wonderful it is. And I just can’t wait for you to share more about it and get other moms into it. Because I know that it will benefit us in our busy busy lives so much. So um, before we even jump into our topic for today, I just wanted you to share a little bit about you and what you do.
Kelly 6:19
Sure. So I’m Kelly Smith, I’m a yoga and meditation teacher. I am the founder of yoga for you, which is location independent yoga and meditation school. And then I’m probably best known for my podcast, which is mindful and minutes. And it’s all short, guided meditations. And right now, I work primarily on my podcast, helping people dive into a meditation practice. And then leading meditation retreats, and doing continue to add trainings, for wellness practitioners who want to learn how to teach meditation, restorative yoga, and yoga nidra.
Toni-Ann Mayembe 6:55
Nice, nice. And you have a very unique story on how you even got into meditation, I really wanted you to share that just because I know a lot of times we think of meditation as something like only the monks do, or those people, but it’s really something that we can all do. So I was just wondering if you could share a little bit about your story and how you even got started with doing meditation.
Kelly 7:17
Yeah, so and we were chatting a little bit off mic before we hit recording about this. And so I well, even before the sword I’m about to tell I, the first time I really fell into meditation for myself was when I was a teenager. And my mom was battling breast cancer, and I was her primary caregiver. And we used to do like yoga and things together. But during her treatment and recovery, she needed something gentler. And that was a time where we started to like explore meditation together. And I, you know, thought it was, you know, a little bit like out there. I was 16. And I was like, Oh, what is this woowoo stuff. But I started to it helped me so much with like, just my emotions and sitting with my feelings and being present during such a challenging time. And so I like dabbled in it then but kind of put it on the backburner for a while. And then it wasn’t until several years later when I was in my mid 20s. And I had opened up a yoga studio in rural Missouri. And I could feel that a lot of my students, they wanted to explore meditation, but in a way that felt digestible and also palatable for them. There were several concerns about, you know, meditation being against the religion and things like that. So they just wanted to be able to, you know, decrease their stress, decrease their blood pressure, you know, learn how to just focus on their breath for a few minutes. So I did kind of take an interesting route. And I decided if I want to learn about meditation, that I should go straight to the source. So I did find a group of Buddhist monks that lived in the middle of the Mark Twain forest in Missouri. And I decided to live with them for a few weeks. And everyone definitely thought that I was going to get killed going to meet strangers that I met on the internet in the forest, to learn how to meditate but ended up being just fine, everyone, but, you know, make sure that you do your research before you meet strangers in the forest. And I went and I stayed with them and lived with them for several weeks and really dove into a style meditation called loving kindness meditation, which for me is a really beautiful one, where you work on cultivating loving kindness in your heart and then eventually radiating it out to others. And after I had that experience, I was like all and I had some of the most profound experiences to this day. I’m during that time living with them meditating all day long. And then I brought it back to my students. And now I really like to take some of these, you know, bigger, broader meditation styles and topics and practices and break them down into small little bite sized meditations for primarily busy women and busy moms. Like you and I So that’s what what I like to do now for meditation is help people if they’re really just like getting into it or need like a short practice, or they just want to get down to like, the nitty gritty.
Toni-Ann Mayembe 10:09
Yeah, yeah, meditation is something that I really, I’ve dabbled into it a little bit. Because I knew that it would help me to relax and help with the stress and anxiety. But I was just telling you that I recently started reading this not reading, I keep saying reading, I’m listening to the book on audio is how to train your mind by Chris Bailey in this book has been so so good for me, because it really breaks down how meditation really helps not just to like make you feel good, but also to make you more productive. And I think, especially the moms here on the real half of my podcast, like, we want to be more productive, but we’re just so bombarded with so many things going on. So I really enjoy listening to how he presented. But I know a lot of times moms will be like, oh, yeah, that sounds cool. And everything. But you know, they’ll think like, oh, you know, that means that I have to spend like, so much time doing meditation. I don’t have time for that. So I was just wondering, Kelly, like, what are some of the misconceptions that you’ve noticed that a lot of people have about meditation when it comes to actually getting started?
Kelly 11:21
Yeah, I love that question. And one of my personal passions in life is like debunking these, like meditation myths that we have. And I would say some of the biggest ones is when people think that you have to meditate for a long time, so like 30 to 60 minutes a day to get the benefits. And that’s not true. Studies show us that anywhere from eight to 12 minutes daily. So I just like to hit it in the middle and say, 10 minutes a day, is enough to not only feel like the emotional benefits, but also to tap into some of those neurological benefits that you were just talking about whether it’s increased productivity, but it actually has been shown that if you meditate for like 10 minutes a day, for about four to eight weeks, little bit different for everyone, that the actual makeup of your brain begins to change. So the amygdala, which is a part of the brain, that is the fear, pain and anxiety center of the brain, that begins to shrink, meaning you’re going to have smaller physiological fear, pain and anxiety responses in your everyday life and to stressors, which I don’t know what it is, it’s like the minute your baby comes out into this world, your capability to worry and have anxiety just seems to increase by like tenfold. And the part of the brain that has to do with higher cognitive function, emotion regulation, productivity and mental clarity. So the prefrontal cortex, it’s like the part, if you’re going to just put your hand like on your forehead, that part of the brain begins to become stronger and denser and increasing gray matter. And you have more neurons and neurological activity in that area. So 10 minutes a day is enough to not only feel less stressed, and to feel better, but it actually changes the makeup of your brain. So you have less pain, fear, and worry, and you are able to concentrate better, you have better productivity, better emotion regulation, and have more mental clarity, which I think is incredible. So I like to think of meditation, like you would brush your teeth every day, like for oral hygiene or take a shower, for your body, like your meditation is sort of like just your daily mental hygiene. So that’s a big one is that you have to sit there for a long time, but 10 minutes a day, even eight minutes a day is enough. And for busy moms, you know, and you know, as a busy mom, myself, I always tell people, if you’re really struggling to find the time, just do 10 minutes less of something that isn’t serving you. So those 10 minutes of scrolling on Instagram or tick tock before bed, right? Do you know 10 minutes less of that or when you check your emails first thing in the morning, or whatever it is, we all have our things that we do to decompress that probably aren’t serving us in the long run, just do 10 less minutes of that, and instead swap it out for 10 minutes of meditation. There’s also a an idea that meditation in and of itself is a religious practice. And I really like to speak to that one because although meditation came from religious practices, and is practiced by a lot of different religions, the act of meditation itself is just single pointed concentration. And that is not a religious practice. What I mean by that is, every day when we’re walking around, and we’re just living our day to day lives, our minds are like a light bulb. So the lights on it shine in all direction, doing a lot of things. When we meditate. We’re just trying to turn that light bulb into a laser pointer. We’re trying to take all of our mental energy and focus it on one thing that could be your breath. That could be a feeling. That could be a mantra. That could be if you choose to incorporate that into your faith that could be you know, prayer or any kind of a devotional thing but meditation in and of itself is not religious. It’s a verb to many meditate and you’re just doing single pointed concentration. And I also think that the other biggest misconception around meditation is that you somehow are like, magically supposed to like turn off your brain. So again, back, like the light bulb analogy, like, you’re supposed to be able to just like, flip off the light and have like, no thoughts, and you can just turn your brain off. That’s not one, how it works. Or two, what we’re going for, what we’re trying to do is when thoughts pop up, or we get distracted, is it’s not about just turning off your mind and having no thoughts. It’s being able to try to bring yourself back to your point of concentration again, and again and again, and working on building that like concentration and focus. Muscle. So if you’re, you know, like, Oh, I’m so busy, or, you know, people who say, Oh, I’m so add, I can’t meditate, but from someone who does have ADHD, I’m here to tell you that you can. And you know, people say my brains too busy, I could never meditate. That’s like saying, I’m too dirty to take a shower. And it’s like, how are you going to remedy that situation? Right? If you feel like your brain is so busy, it’s always going a million miles an hour, then how are you going to try to slow it down? It’s going to be through meditation, just like if you’re like, Oh, I’m so dirty. I didn’t take a shower. You’re going to use meditation to do that. Like, for your minds? I think a lot of people think it’s just like turning your mind off. But it really isn’t.
Toni-Ann Mayembe 16:20
Yes, yes. You brought up so so many good things. And I promise I probably thought of like each one of those misconceptions and thought like, oh, yeah, I have to sit down for 30 or 40 minutes. And oh, yeah, like that’s pretty Buddhist monks, and Oh, yeah. I’m supposed to magically just like, be quiet. And none of that happens. So I love that you, you really, like tackle all of those misconceptions. But the one that I really want you to really expand on is about the time, because I know a lot of times when we get ready to sit down and meditate will think like, Oh, my goodness, like, this is a long time, like, what am I supposed to be doing? Like? Like, I’m just like, my brain is like going everywhere. Like, I don’t think I’m doing it right. So like, what would you tell the mom that is like just getting started? And is sitting down for the first time to meditate? Like, what are some of the things that you want that mom to focus and concentrate on so that they can get the benefits that you’re talking about? From doing this meditation practice for 10 minutes a day?
Kelly 17:24
Yeah, I think a wonderful place to start. And this is honestly what inspired me to start my podcast. But I think guided meditations, if you’re first starting can be such a wonderful and powerful tool. And there’s so many great resources out there, whether it’s different apps, like Insight Timer, or calm or finding a podcast like mine, or there’s other meditation teachers that are doing beautiful, guided meditations as well like short ones, like I do. And I think that can be such a wonderful place to get started. Because you don’t feel like you have to automatically like take the training wheels off and like just sit down and know, you know how to do something that you’ve never really done before. So I always tell people, if you’re just starting, and you like having the help of a guide, guided meditations can be a wonderful place to start. It’s almost like you’re putting like, if you’re bowling, you’re putting up like those little bumpers to help keep you you know, your bowling ball like in line so you don’t get a gutter ball, you can definitely start with guided meditations. But one thing when you’re designing your meditation practice are doing it for the first time. There’s a lot of different styles out there. It’s almost like when you’re trying to find like a pair of jeans, right? Like I don’t know, about, you know, you but I hate jeans shopping. And once you find like the style or like the fit that works for your body, then you’re like, okay, great that I can just get like this pair of jeans and like a few different washes. But meditation is like that, too, you have to find the one that fits you. And that’s right for you. So that might be sitting in for 10 minutes and just trying to really focus on your breath, like feel the air as it starts at the nose and then moves through, you know, the sinuses down the throat to the lungs, and then back out. Sitting with your breath can be really common. There’s one called noting, like you’re making note of things. And it’s almost like you’re just sitting and making note of all of the thoughts that pass through your mind in 10 minutes. Um, guided meditations, like I said, a wonderful place to start. And then another one that I love I touched on earlier is loving kindness meditation. And that’s where you just sit and you try to cultivate feelings of love and kindness and gratitude, like into your heart and just sit with that beautiful feeling and let it move through you and radiate out of you for a few minutes. And that can be a really beautiful practice I have found especially for moms because one it’s very easy like to recall a memory or that feeling of like, I mean what is unconditional love other than like a mother’s love and sometimes unlocking that feeling and just sitting it with it and letting it move through you and sending it to yourself sending it to your children sending it to your family. even challenging yourself sending it to people that you know, are really difficult in your life. I have found that for moms in particular, that can be a really beautiful and simple practice as well.
Toni-Ann Mayembe 20:10
I love it. And I did not even know about some of those different styles, like I’m trying out a couple of different things, especially the guided meditation. And like you said, you kind of have to figure out like, what works, because there’s been some that I’m like, wow, like, I don’t like this. But then there’s others that I’ll do the same one over and over and over again, just because I love how I feel afterwards. But I really liked that you brought up the different styles, because I think a lot of times we get kind of caught up in thinking like there has to be a certain way, but it can be many different ways. Binding.
Kelly 20:41
Yeah, and that’s an honestly, that’s why I think about it as like Gene shopping in a way where it’s like, I don’t know, like, what do I personally like? Do I like a skinny jean, do I like a bootcut? Do I like a light wash or a dark wash? Like the only way to really find what you feel comfortable in is to try on a bunch of different ones. So I always encourage people, you know, try different things like branch out, you know, sure, give my podcast a listen. But also try you know, other teachers, try other podcasts, try different styles, you know, read a blog post about one, give it a try, like, you have to try on these different styles. And then you’ll probably find a handful of styles that resonate with you. Like there is no right or wrong style. There’s definitely styles that work best for different people. But your mind and your experience is completely unique to you. And your meditation practice will be completely unique to you as well. Because you’re working with your feelings, your mind, your body, and no one else can have that same experience like you can because you’re living it. So it’s really just kind of finding like, what feels good. And don’t be afraid to dabble and try different things and be like, ah, that’s not for me or be like, Oh, that really kind of speaks to me and just lean into that a
Toni-Ann Mayembe 21:51
little bit. Yeah, definitely. No, Kelly, especially for the moms that are like super busy and have a whole lot of things going on. Like when, or like what time of the day, would you say is like a good time to actually implement this meditation practice? Would you say morning, evening or whatever works best for you?
Kelly 22:11
So this is a question that I get asked a lot. And my answer has changed since becoming a parent, I used to say, do the first 10 minutes of your day or the last 10 minutes of your day. And I I do stand by that for the most part. But I will say specifically to moms do the time that you’re most likely to stick with what I will say doesn’t typically work well is saying, you know, in the morning, okay, I’m going to meditate today and not have like a plan as to what time you’re going to meditate. Because we all know, it’s like all of a sudden, the whole day has gone by, you have done a million different things. And you’re just like, I’m wiped, I’m gonna go to bed. Oh, shoot. Now I feel like I have to meditate. Like you don’t want it to feel like one of those, you know, one more thing that you have to like step in somewhere. So if there’s naturally a place that makes sense for you, maybe that’s naptime. Or lunchtime or after you drop your kids off for school. Do that. So that’s kind of my advice. Like for mom specific. If I was just answering this like generally, for a new meditator, I would usually say the first 10 minutes of your day, or the last 10 minutes of your day. Because since a day can be so busy, hopefully everyday, at some point, you’ll go to bed at night and wake up in the morning. And that might be the only constant thing in your whole day. So building it into just a habit of either. And the way you kind of figure out which one to start with, whether it’s morning or night is again, realistically which one are you more likely to stick to. So even if you want to be a morning person, but like getting out of bed is really hard in the morning, chances are trying to you know, set your alarm 10 minutes earlier to get up even earlier to meditate realistically at first maybe won’t be as sustainable. So just do the last 10 minutes of your day to quiet your mind before you go to bed. But if you are the kind of person where you know you like to get up and going in the morning, maybe like to do things before the kids wake up for you maybe the first 10 minutes of the day are going to be the best. But I have found you know, by and large, first 10 minutes of the day or last 10 minutes of the day seemed to be the most sustainable. But my exception to that rule is moms because we know you know sometimes it’s like the whole day just gets turned upside down. So try to just carve out a time that realistically you can do consistently each day and that might be a little bit different for every mob.
Toni-Ann Mayembe 24:35
got it got it. Now, Kelly, I wanted you to touch on what to expect or some of the things to kind of help motivate us to keep going. And the reason why I’m bringing this up is because a lot of times we have this thought in our mind of what meditation is supposed to look like or how we’re supposed to feel or what we’re supposed to do and then when it doesn’t really go the way that we planned or like how you’re talking about how our brain is supposed to turn off. And it’s not and but it’s like your brain is has a whole lot of chatter going on, you’re like, wait a minute, like, this isn’t right, like, something’s, something’s wrong. And when did you just talk to the moms because I know we’re gonna, we’re gonna feel like we’re not doing it right. So like, help us understand, like, you know, we’re doing okay, or we’re doing it right. But it just may not be what we’re, we’re thinking it should be.
Kelly 25:23
Yeah, that it’s interesting that you bring that up, this is something that, for me comes up time and time again. And I And before we were chatting I was doing this month, I’m doing like a small group like meditation accelerator, and I had a lot of moms actually joined that group. And before we start, I asked everyone like, what are you worried about? And so many of them are worried about, like, giving up on themselves. And like, you know, quitting and not finishing. We’re basically for four weeks meditating together every day, for four weeks. But they’re the other biggest fear is that they weren’t going to do it. Right. And, you know, no one can see me right now. But I’m doing those little air quotes around like, right. And, and I love to speak on this, because I think there’s something too I think a lot of moms struggle with about wanting to just do things, right, or do things the correct way. And again, when you’re working with your mind, and like your heart and your emotions, there is no quote like, right way. What I will say, though, is I really challenge people to step away from the thought of like, labeling things as like, good or bad, or, like, productive or not productive. So often, I’ll hear people to be like, Oh, I had a great meditation today. Or I really, you know, had a bad meditation today. And I challenged people to step away from this sort of like black or white thinking of like, I had a good productive, like correct meditation practice, or a bad unproductive, like I did it wrong meditation, if you’re just sitting and practicing single pointed concentration, whether it be you know, feeling like it’s more productive, or not, or feel more pleasant, or less pleasant. Or if you just kind of go into that space, and you’re like, wow, I really went deep into that meditation today versus the days where you’re like, oh, my gosh, I every five seconds, I’m distracted by something. They are all equal. And they are all just the experience of meditation in that day. So I think if you can just let go of this idea of like, Oh, am I doing it quote, like, right? If you’re doing it, you are doing it the right way. If you’re trying and your intention is to sit for a few minutes to meditate, you’re already doing it the right way. And try to bring some lightness and be more inquisitive with your meditation practice. So instead of getting down on yourself, and being like, Oh, I could hardly concentrate today, I was trying to focus on my breath. And every five seconds, I started thinking about, you know, writing my grocery list or my to do list, just be a little inquisitive and be like, Oh, wow, that’s so interesting. Like, I’m really distracted by my grocery list today. And try to create like a little bit of, of lightness and kindness, almost like the way you would encourage one of your children. If they’re trying to learn something new. And they’re sort of struggling, you’re like, Oh, that’s okay. Like, you know, you’re just learning. We’re new. It’s all you know, failure and learning. It’s all part of the experience. Try to take that same like, lightness, and kindness, but also just kind of like inquisitive mind to yourself and your meditation practice, and just let go of the worry of doing it right or wrong. There is no right or wrong. So you can all just, you know, get rid of that worry. And yeah, just be inquisitive as usually my best advice. If you find that maybe a certain style or a certain day, it’s more challenging than another day be like, Oh, that’s really interesting. Or, Oh, I you know, I didn’t quite feel that same, you know, feeling that I felt yesterday, I wonder what’s going on with that. And just be a little more inquisitive, I find helps to take a lot of the pressure off and just have fun with it meditation. It can be fun.
Toni-Ann Mayembe 28:43
Yes, yes. And I’m so glad that you said that. Because I know, when I initially started doing meditation, I thought I was doing it wrong. I was like, I don’t think I’m doing this right. So I’m just not gonna do it anymore. And then I found out like, that was like, the worst thing I could have done because I was actually doing it right, quote, unquote, right. But I didn’t notice, like, it’s all of the benefits that that I was receiving from it. So I’m so glad that you said that, because I know that moms are gonna get started and they’re gonna be like, Nope, this, I’m not doing it right, and just stop. So I just want to encourage you like, you are not alone. I do too. Even now,
Kelly 29:19
I still do this. That’s probably one of the most common things I hear as a meditation teacher is like, how do I know if I’m doing it? Right? And I always tell people remember, single pointed concentration. So if you’re taking your mind, you’re trying to go from a light bulb to laser pointer and focus your mind on one thing. You’re doing it and you’re doing a great job. It might be if you’re finding that, you know, you’re really having a struggle with the style that you start with. Maybe just switching and trying a different style for a little bit too might help as well. But yeah, if you’re doing single pointed concentration, you’re meditating. You’re doing great.
Toni-Ann Mayembe 29:51
Yes, definitely. Now, Kelly, you given us a lot to get us going and you’ve got me super pumped. I think I’m gonna go sit down. meditate for a little bit here. I am definitely ready to start getting some of those benefits because I did not know about the eight to 12 minutes a day. So yeah, all
Kelly 30:09
you need and we can all find we can all find eight minutes a day.
Toni-Ann Mayembe 30:13
Yes, yes, definitely, I can find eight minutes because I do more than eight on Instagram. So got it, Kelly. Kelly, before we signed up, I just wanted you to share either motivational quote, or some words of encouragement for us. We’re all happy Moms.
Kelly 30:30
My words of encouragement is that you are doing amazing. Whatever you are, wherever you are, wherever you’re listening to our voices, know that you are doing amazing that you are making the best decisions for you and your child based on the information that you have. And there is absolutely no better mother for your children in this world. Other than you and you and your children have been put together for a reason and that you are an amazing mom. And don’t ever think anything different.
Toni-Ann Mayembe 31:04
Yes. Love it. Love it. Kelly, I’m gonna put you on the spot and see if you say yes to this. Kelly, would you be open to doing a quick two minute guided meditation with us?
Kelly 31:15
Yes. Absolutely. Let’s do it. Three minutes. Absolutely. You can. Okay, cool. All right. So wherever you’re at, go ahead and just close your eyes. Now I say close the eyes, but turn the gaze inward. So just gazing within and to speak in to let the dust settle. So whatever happened earlier today, whatever’s coming up later today, none of that matters right now. Just be here with your body and your breath in this moment. Check in with how you’re feeling. How you’re really feeling right now. Check in with your breath. How is your breathing and then begin to slow it down. So every single exhale, the breath becomes a little bit slower, a little deeper, a little smoother.
Kelly 32:32
And check in with your physical body and notice where you’re squeezing or clenching or holding tension. And on your next exhale, feel that breath physically remove that tension from your body.
Kelly 32:53
And then set in stillness. purchase this next little bit of time being still and being present for whatever is happening right now in this moment for you.
Kelly 33:27
And then together, we’ll take a big deep breath in through the nose and say it out through the mouth. And then you can blink your eyes open and you just meditated for three minutes, my friend.
Toni-Ann Mayembe 33:41
That was a good three minutes. I know right? Wait a minute, Kelly. No, we got to keep going.
Kelly 33:47
I know that’s you know that it’s so funny because I find more and more. That it’s like once you kind of get into it even it’s like your body craves it. And so even if it’s just like a few minutes, and then you’re just like, Oh no, I want like one more minute or two more minutes of stillness. And it’s almost like your body’s just like creating like, just a little bit more a little bit more. And like it just it feels so good. Especially I think for moms because we’re always just moving at the speed of light to just like, stop, slow down. And be still we not only crave it, but also sometimes and I imagine some of your listeners felt this to, you might have been surprised at what you were thinking about or maybe even an area of your body where you’re holding tension. You didn’t even realize it. Like if we don’t slow down and really like check in and be present. It’s hard to actually know what’s just going on and what’s happening beneath the surface. So I think it can be really powerful to just stop and slow down and be like, how am I actually doing, what’s happening in my body, how my breathing and what thoughts are popping up for me. And just that little check in for a few minutes can be so powerful and informative especially for busy moms. Yes, yes.
Toni-Ann Mayembe 35:01
And thank you so much for doing that with us. That was so good. And I know that I will be heading over to the podcast to do some more with you. So thank you so much, Kelly.
Kelly 35:11
Thank you. I appreciate it so
Toni-Ann Mayembe 35:12
much. Now, Kelly, before we sign off, tell us where we can find you online if we want to learn more about you or just get some more of this wonderful goodness that you have going on,
Kelly 35:22
sir. So wherever you’re listening to my voice right now, you can check out my podcast, it’s called mindful in minutes. It’s all short guided meditations, I do have a spin off if anyone is currently expecting called meditation, Mama. And that’s a small collection of prenatal meditations to help you during this, you know, Wild Wild pregnancy ride and help you connect with baby. And then you can find me on Instagram, which is at yoga for you online. I answer my DMs. If you have questions for me about anything that I spoke about today or anything like that, you can go ahead and slide into my DMs and I’m happy to chat with you about it. And I guess my website yoga for online.com always a good place to start. So that’s where you can find me hanging out.
Toni-Ann Mayembe 36:04
Yes, and I’ll make sure to include all of those links in the show notes. Again, Kelly, thank you so much for coming on. I really appreciate it. Oh, thank
Kelly 36:13
you this made my whole day getting to do this.
Toni-Ann Mayembe 36:19
Now that does it for this week’s episode of The Real happy mom podcast be sure to head on over to Real happy mom.com/ 173 to grab the links in the show notes that were mentioned in this episode. And do me a favor make sure that you go on over to facebook and join us in the Facebook community. You can do that by going over to row happy mom comm slash community. And there you will find more interaction and engagement from me as well as some interaction from other working moms just like you. So join me over there in the Facebook community. Let’s have some fun and talk some more about this episode. what to think. All right now that’s it for today. Make sure you stay tuned for next week.
