How to Go From Annoyed, Irritated Mom to Calm Mom

There are ways to prevent becoming that annoyed and irritated mom. Or what I like to call Mommy Monster.

Check out how to be a more calm and happy mom.

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Be conscious of your breathing.

You probably heard it before, “You need to breathe.”

Although this can be pretty annoying when you are already stressed or anxious, there is so much truth behind it.

Deep breathing is one of the best and easiest ways to lower stress. When you breathe deeply and slowly, messages are sent to your brain to calm down and relax.

When you focus on breathing, you take your awareness away from what annoys you and momentarily quiet your mind.

In the episode, I mentioned inhaling for 3 seconds and then exhaling for 3 seconds. Then I worked up to inhaling for 5 seconds and exhaling for 5 seconds.

Many smartwatches (including the Apple watch and the Fitbit) have a breathing feature that can help with the timing of your breathing so that you take slow deep breaths.

Check out episode 19 with Esther to hear more about breathing to reduce stress.

Count to 10

One day I was stressed. I called my mom to ask her what to do with my son because he was driving me crazy.

After venting to her about what her perfect grandson was doing, I asked her, “how did you do this?”

Meaning, how did she make motherhood look so easy?

My mom has three girls, and as you can imagine, the house can get pretty interesting.

When she heard me ask that question, she started to laugh.

I was a little annoyed because I wasn’t telling any jokes. And she was laughing like she heard one of my best jokes.

After she stopped laughing, she told me to count to 10.

Honestly, it was not what I wanted to hear, but it sure did help.

First, counting to 10 gets you to calm down enough to focus.

You can focus and process what you feeling and why you feel the way that you do.

Secondly, counting to 10 helps you calm down and put things into perspective. Many times things aren’t as bad as they seem once you calm down and take a step back.

These 10 seconds will allow you to regroup before saying or doing something you regret.

Remember, they’re just a kid.

Remember that your child is just that … a child.

I have often watched kids push their parents to the limits. Kids know what they’re doing at times when they’re testing and pushing the limits.

But you have to remember that they’re just a kid. And you can’t let a kid push you to that limit.

So don’t let a kid bully you and push you around.

You’re a grownup. You’re not a kid.

Don’t let a five-year-old push you around and get you all upset.

Stop and acknowledge your little one.

What helped me with my little one is just acknowledging my son. Take notice of what he’s going through and what he’s feeling.

I’ll be honest: sometimes, I come home and don’t want to talk.

Because of what I do all day, I’ve had enough of talking at the end of the day, and mentally I want to check out for a little bit.

But when you’re five years old, you got a million questions. So I can’t check out.

With my five-year-old, I’ve learned to acknowledge him.

Listen to what he has to say. And take time to understand how he’s feeling.

Even though it is tempting, I don’t brush him off. He does feel these things and has real emotions. So I don’t want to disregard his feelings or what he has to say.

I have found that if I don’t give him the attention he needs, he turns into a baby Hulk. Then I head down the road of turning into Mommy Monster.

So take time to stop and acknowledge your little one.

Say yes to playtime

I listened to a great TED Talk by Shonda Rimes. She talked about how she always tried to say yes to her kids when they asked her to play.

Even if she were late or already late to work, she would say yes. She would say yes even if she were tired and didn’t feel like playing.

At first, I was shaking my head when I heard this.

But as I listened and understood more of what she was saying, I started to see how saying yes helps my little guy and me.

Firstly, playtime gives you a mental break.

For a moment, you can stop thinking about everything you need to do, everything you haven’t done, and all the things that are stressing you out.

This mental break gives you time to relax your mind.

Many times you may feel like you can’t be creative. Or your creative juices have stopped flowing.

Usually, it’s because you’re just constantly going, going, going. And you don’t allow your mind to relax. And to be free and be in that creative spot.

So having that playtime allows you to get some of that creativity back and have fun.

Saying yes to playtime makes your child feel good and loved.

So it’s a win-win for everyone.

Think of your child like this when they throw a tantrum

I heard this really good podcast, and forgive me; whoever did this podcast interview, I don’t remember your name.

On the podcast, the lady said that when her child is throwing a tantrum, she pretends like her child is drunk.

It sounds crazy, but hear me out.

Rarely do you get upset at a drunk person because you know they’re drunk?

It’s not like giving them a pass, but you know the person is not in their right mind. So you don’t let what they say or do bother you much.

Telling yourself that your child is just drunk and acting out will help prevent you from getting upset, stressed, and irritated.

When I heard this, I thought it was hilarious because when kids act up and throw tantrums, they aren’t themselves.

They are acting like a drunk person who is not being themselves.

This helped me to remember not to lose my cool when the little guy jumped up and down throwing a tantrum.

And I hope that you found some of these tips help because I want you to stay a happy mom.

I’ll tell you this, over the last year, I learned a lot as a mom and how to stay happier and grateful. And how to have more joy and not allow the stresses of life to get me down.

I want you to have this as well.

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