Real Happy Mom

Practical tips and encouragement for moms

Tips for Decluttering Hobbies This Summer

Summertime comes wanting to try out some new hobbies, whether it is indoors or outdoors.

I’m pretty sure the kids have probably asked you to go ahead and buy a canoe or buy some new rackets to play racquetball or tennis. Or maybe they wanted to do some knitting or build a Lego castle. And while all of that sounds like a whole lot of fun, it comes with a price. And it comes with space. You have to have somewhere to put all of the stuff that comes with these hobbies. So what are you going to do?

How will you try out some new hobbies, but not have the house be cluttered? That’s what we’re going to talk about in this episode.

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About Deanna

Deanna Yates is the founder and CEO of Wannabe Clutter Free and the host of the popular podcast, the Wannabe Minimalist Show, where she helps busy families learn how to let go of the stuff holding them back so they can enjoy more time together, stop spending their weekends cleaning house, and wake up excited for the day ahead. 

Deanna is mom to an energetic daughter, wife to a startup entrepreneur, and is living her dream life in San Diego, CA. When she’s not helping clients realize their dreams, you can find her paddle boarding, searching for the tastiest breakfast burrito, or balancing her love of world travel with her love of snuggling on the couch.

Connect with Deanna

Links Mentioned

Podcast Sponsor

This episode is sponsored by Cozy Earth. Experience the luxury with Cozy Earth and get 40% by using the code REALHAPPYMOM40 at realhappymom.com/cozy 

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Transcript of this episode

Toni-Ann Mayembe 0:00
So with the summertime comes wanting to try out some new hobbies, and I’m pretty sure the kids probably asked you to go ahead and buy a canoe or buy some new rackets to play racquetball or tennis. Or maybe they wanted to do some knitting or some other find a hobby. And while all of that sounds like a whole lot of fun, it comes with a price. And it comes with space, because you have to have somewhere to put all of these things for these hobbies. So what are you going to do? Like? How are you going to try out some new hobbies, but not have the house be a cluttered mess? That’s what we’re going to talk about in this episode. So I have my friend Deanna on and we’re going to be talking about how we can start decluttering some of our hobbies, because with summertime comes us wanting to get out and try some new things. But we can do those things without having a whole lot of clutter. And we can actually start to do some fun things. And not cost any money. Ah, gas by now. You want to learn how to do all that. You got to stay tuned to this episode. You are listening to the podcast, a weekly podcast with easy working moms to get inspiration, encouragement and practical tips for this journey called motherhood. My name is Toni-Ann. And you are listening to Episode 184. All right, today, I am super pumped because we’re staying in the theme of summertime, and just making this summer a great one. And today I have a friend and special guests, Deanna on the podcast and welcome to the podcast.

Deanna 1:44
Thank you, Tony. And I’m so excited to be here.

Toni-Ann Mayembe 1:46
Yes, I’m excited to talk to you. Again, if you haven’t heard I was on her podcast not too long ago, I’ll make sure to include that link in the show notes. So yes, I’m always excited when I get to talk to you, because we always have some fun conversations, especially today. So yeah, welcome back. Thank you. Now, before we jump into our topic for today, I want you to share a little bit about you and what you do.

Deanna 2:09
Sure, well, my name is Deanna Yates, and I am the CEO and founder of want to be clutter free. And that is my website. And I have a companion podcast that you just mentioned, one of you minimalist. And my goal really in life is just to help busy families. And I know you help busy moms. And so that’s why one of the reasons we’ve connected so well is because I want to help women especially live the good life with less stuff. So less physical stuff, less mental stuff, less emotional stuff, it’s all holding us back. And so I really enjoy sharing what I’ve done in my own life to let it go. And I love having guests on my podcast like you who can share their expertise and, you know, really dive deeper into individual topics. And for myself, it’s mostly through decluttering, organizing, and cleaning our homes, and then creating the systems so that our homes run on autopilot. And I like to say that they run as smooth as creamy peanut butter or sun butter, if nuts aren’t your thing. Because I believe that living a better life starts in our homes, our homes are our refuge, it’s our place where we, you know, unwind, we get to be our most authentic selves, we get to build ourselves and our families up in our homes. And if our homes are not in order, it’s really hard to create those, you know, good building blocks. And so I really just want people to be able to wake up excited to, you know, tackle their day and have the energy that they need to do so. Because I really just think the world would be a much better place if there were happier people in it.

Toni-Ann Mayembe 3:47
Yes, I cannot agree more. And the one thing that like stuck out to me when you were talking was about less stuff, because I think we’ve just acquired so many things, and I’m gonna talk about myself, I have so much stuff. And then I have a husband who has this thing where he has a lot of sentimental value on things. So even if he’s never used it, he will not get rid of it. So we have a lot of stuff that I’m like, okay, but it’s time to let it go. And during the summertime, I know that’s not really the time that we typically think about decluttering or, you know, minimizing things. But this is a good time to go ahead and get started with some decluttering especially when it comes to our hobbies. And I know we were talking about this before I hit record. So I wanted you to share with us like some of the things that you have seen, especially with some of the moms who are going into summertime, and they want to try out new things. And as a result, we’ve accumulated something so how can we, you know, go through this process of decluttering especially as we’re trying out new hobbies or letting go of some hobbies?

Deanna 4:54
Absolutely. So I do think I actually think this overtime is a fantastic time to declutter. because I know we all think about it at the beginning of the year, a fresh start a new, you know, New Year New you kind of thing. But I think that anytime there’s a change of season, especially when you live somewhere where the seasons are so distinct, you know, I live in Southern California, it’s practically summer all the time here. Awesome. But, you know, I have lived in the Midwest, and I’ve lived in places with a very strict climate change. And so, in the summertime, you’re switching things out anyway, right? You’re putting away the winter things, and you’re getting out your summer things. And if you don’t want to have to deal with those winter things anymore, I get it will. Everything I talked about will work for that, too. So we can talk about this stuff later. But at the summertime, yes, your this is a new, like new, fresh, oh my gosh, it’s so wonderful after being so cold, and like closed up in the house to be able to just kind of, you know, let loose and have this time. And I know a lot of us think about vacationing and doing that kind of stuff. But let’s talk about the hobbies that and things we do in the summer, right. So oftentimes, we’ll go to the beach, or we’ll go camping, or we’ll have a lot of barbecue cookouts at our house, we’ll have people over, we’ll be entertaining, maybe a little bit more in our backyards, we’re using different spaces in our home. And with that, comes going to the garage, getting out the box of stuff that belongs with that hobby, or, you know, that goes with those activities. And when you are looking at these boxes and these things, I want you to think about what is it about this hobby that I like, right? Do I really like this hobby? Am I really jazzed up by this? Or is it just something I feel like I have to do? It brings me back to encounter I don’t know if you saw the movie in Konto. But there’s all this like expectation, right? We have all these expectations on us for things we think other people want us to be doing, or things we think we have to continue doing. But we don’t have to right if they’re really not lighting you up, have an honest conversation with your friends and family and just say guys, look can someone else host the barbecue this week, because I don’t want to do it. So there’s one thing sorry, I’m getting to that emotional decluttering section. But let’s go back to the physical stuff. So as you’re going through these hobbies, let’s say I’m going to take the beach, right, because that’s something near and dear to my heart, we go to the beach a lot. So I’m going to take my beach bin and you can use this for any of the other hobbies you do. When you are getting out your stuff. If there is stuff at the bottom of that box that you’re not taking with you, you’re not getting out to use it this summer, I want to encourage you and challenge you to just let it go donate it, throw it away. If it’s not useful, just get rid of it. Don’t hold on to it just in case because it obviously is not worth using this summer and it’s not going to get better over time. Time is not good to our products. It will continue to degrade corrode, you know get worse while it’s sitting in the garage. So if you’re not using it this summer, because it’s not good enough. I have newsflash it’s not gonna be good enough next summer a little harsh, but hopefully that helps.

Toni-Ann Mayembe 8:07
Definitely, because I was just thinking about this, this closet or right over here, all the beach stuff is in there. And I know that we have some some of the sunblock in Aloe because you know, you don’t want to burn your skin get all crazy. So I have all of that stuff in there. And I was just looking at it like right before we got on to talking. I was like, that’s a bunch of stuff in here. I know I’m not gonna use but just in case, I’ll keep it. So I’m glad that you pointed out that time is not good for our products. So definitely going through that

Deanna 8:35
and especially those things you’re going to put on your skin, I would highly recommend everybody just throw out your old sunblock. Get new sunblock. I know it’s expensive. But I also would like to encourage anybody that will be in the saltwater regions, please do use reef safe sunblock, even if you’re not near a reef. It’s really important. It’s something near and dear to my heart. So I just want to put that PSA out there, please.

Toni-Ann Mayembe 8:58
Yes, thank you for pointing that one out. And it’s in. It’s crazy. Because all it takes just a little extra effort to look at the labels to see if it really is. But yes, I’m totally with you. I don’t know if I told you I was an environmental science major. So I’m totally with you on that one. So, I’m glad that you gave us these tips and things to think about, especially when it comes to you know, just thinking, you know, what is it about this hobby that I like, or don’t like? Because I, for instance, I know I have some things in the garage right now that are taking up space making it hard for me to get out of my car, because there’s just so much stuff in there. And one of them is some exercise equipment that I thought I wasn’t gonna use and I don’t and yeah, I know doesn’t necessarily go with the summertime but typically during the summer is when I’m in the garage more. So now that we’ve kind of identified some items that we can let go up or donate and things like that. What would you say like, you know, like emotionally because you started to talk about Add that a little bit too, because I think a lot of times we forget that our emotions is definitely connected to some of the physical clutter that’s going on to like, what are some things you will point out? Or, or make sure that we pay attention to when it comes to the emotional clutter?

Deanna 10:15
Oh, absolutely. And this goes back to your husband and his sentimental two. So I’m gonna tell touch about both. Okay, so first off with that equipment, every time you get out of car, you could see it on your face right now you feel guilty about not using it, it makes you feel bad. So get rid of it. The money’s already spent, you’re not getting the money back. Unless, of course, you bought it at IKEA less than a year ago, and you can take it back, they do take everything back. So if you have something at IKEA, and you’re like, oh, I don’t end up wanting that, take it back, they take it back. Okay. So there’s that. Um, the other thing, though, is, if it makes you feel bad to let it go, then think about who might want to use it, give it away on like a local Buy Nothing group, we have a fantastic Buy Nothing group in my community. And it’s so nice, because I literally can post it, I can put it on my porch, and someone will pick it up. And then I know and I can pick who I want to give it to like if sometimes my daughter like if we give my daughter stuff away, she likes to pick who it goes to. So she has that connection. And so that part is really nice. So it’s an if it’s an emotional thing for you think about if there’s someone you can give it to see if there’s any I mean, right now, the you know, the crisis in Ukraine is so big, are there any refugees in your area that you can give some of this stuff to I know, in our area, we actually have a population of Afghan refugees that are looking for things, so not maybe some way that you can help and give back and it just makes you feel better as a person and it gets rid of that guilt, that layer of guilt that you have, when you look at all this stuff. And you go, Oh, great, you know, you just have that icky moment. Okay, so that’s one way to deal with the emotional. The second is, with sentimental. So one thing that I think helps with this is when we can picture the life we really want to be living. Because I think so often we get caught up in the day to day minutia that we kind of forget to think about, like the big plan we have for our lives. And when we can step into this big idea of what we really want our life to be like, like, What would our ideal day be like? What would our ideal life be like? When do we want to retire? What do we really want to be doing for work? What lights us up? What hobbies do I love? Who’s the what kind of person do I really want to be? What do I want people to say about me when I die? I know that’s really kind of morbid and out there. But that really can help motivate you to make a change and to actually start living that life that you are excited about. And that really has helped me and my friends and people I work with get rid of these things that we’re holding on to you because there is an emotional attachment because there’s some sentimental value. If it doesn’t align with that person you want to be, or it doesn’t align with what you want people to say about you later, when you’re not in the room or when you have passed on. It’s easier to say, Okay, I liked this, this fit at one point in my life, or I do have this emotional attachment to it. But it’s not going to get me to where I want to go so I can let it go. That makes it a little bit easier. It’s sentimental stuff is really hard. Especially if it is from somebody who has passed away. So one thing we have done is we have taken objects and then recreated them. So right next to me over here, I have actually a see if I can show you.

Deanna 13:46
So I have this record player. It used to be I get back closer to my mic. No, it used to be an old trunk of my husband’s grandparents. And so it’s it’s an old, authentic antique trunk. And we liked it, but it’s rounded on the top. So we never knew what to do with it. So one year for Father’s Day, I actually converted it into a record player for him. And so we had a few records that he had, and he had a record player but we didn’t really have any place to put them. And so I created this chest and now we have this piece of furniture that has sentimental value, it has useful value because we can play records on it, or in it, whatever. And and so it’s just a piece that we really like and it’s a little bit of a conversational starter it it taps into who we are and who we want to be. He’s a musician and he really likes having you know, music around and so that is one way you can do that. So how can you take an item that is sentimental to you but you might not use it in the way it used to be used and recreate it into something. We have a T shirt quilt from a bunch of T shirts when my my father in law passed away and so we have a bunch he used to collect T shirts from all of his travels and my mother in law turned it into Sheets. Hook, she made three of them actually. So she made t shirt quilts, so one for each of her sons, and I think she has one for herself. And they’re just, they’re really special. And so on days, when we’re not having a great day, or something’s going wrong, or we just need a little extra something, we actually can get it out and kind of use it like a hug, like we can hug it and like, it just makes us feel good. And then it’s also useful because it’s warm, and we like it and, you know, can show different places he traveled to and you know, different special memories in our lives. So

Toni-Ann Mayembe 15:30
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Deanna 17:47
Yeah, this is one of the biggest questions, right? So because it happens a lot. And I think, you know, I think we are often drawn to people that are different than us to kind of help round us out. So I think that this comes up quite frequently. And if it’s something that so first off, I would say i Yes, I agree don’t throw their stuff away. I’m in that camp, sorry, Toni-Ann. But if it’s really not useful, if it really is rags, I mean, if it really is garbage and worn out, and and it’s been discarded practically in your house, then okay, I would also make sure that they have their space that they feel safe, because oftentimes people hold on to things because they don’t feel secure about their things, right? They feel like there could be some, you know, past issue where someone took things from them. And you know, there could be some past emotional things there. Or it could just be that they’ve like, well, I’ve got the space, so why not? Right? So they may not see clutter in the same way you do. Because they might think that clutter, that is not really clutter, right? It’s useful, it’s something that’s useful. And so for their thresholds of clutter could be totally different than your threshold. So you just have to set boundaries, you have to say that this is my space, like you can kind of divide up the spaces and it’s like, okay, if this is your half of the closet, you do whatever you want on your half of the closet, this is my half of the closet. And just because the shelf is empty, doesn’t mean that you get to fill it. I like the space, it’s still my half of the closet. So I get to do whatever I want over here, there’s nothing on my half and that’s what I want my have to look like. That’s my half if they have like an office or you know, their own space, their own hobby room or anything like that, they get to do what they want to in there. I say the same thing with children to a degree because I still think we are still teaching our children and we need to teach them the give them the lesson so that they can live the life that they really want to live in the end. If they you know but So no, we’re not taking away their stuff, we’re helping them teach we give them containers, we show them how to keep a nice room, but it’s their room. So I don’t think we should go in there and be taking, you know, or tidying up for them, because it’s their responsibility. Same thing with our spouses. But also, just making sure that there is that communication that if this is a common room, and we share this space, like, we need to come to an understanding of what a level of neatness is, right, like, so a base level of where everybody has content. Because if there is one person that is really annoyed with clutter, it’s really hard when somebody else is a packrat or not. And then it becomes it feels disrespectful for both parties. And so there just needs to be an open conversation and open and honest and not not a conversation where there’s, you know, blame, no blame, no shaming, none of that. Just like, hey, you know, I’ve noticed that when the house is messy, it makes me feel really guilty. I feel like and this is a big one for me. So I’m just using myself an example. I feel like when the house is messy, I’m not doing my job as a mom, I feel like I’m not holding up my end of the bargain. Um, I know, it’s a little that sounds a little antiquated when I say it that way. But like, I It makes me feel just not great. Like I It makes me feel guilty. It makes me feel upset. It makes me you know, it just it’s really hard for me to then concentrate or go have fun, or do the things be the person I want to be when the house is a mess. So it’s less about them. And it’s more about you. And then they can start to see it from your perspective of like, oh, well, I didn’t mean to make you feel like you weren’t doing a good job, you do a great job around the house. Like, you know, there’s usually that conversation and there’s just a little just approach it with a little more curiosity, a little more understanding a little bit more empathy, so that you can come to a meeting term.

Toni-Ann Mayembe 22:00
Yeah, no, no, this was all really good. So I was already thinking about how I can have that conversation. So I promise I’m not gonna throw away his shirts anymore. But before I do it next time. So thank you, that was really, really helpful. Now, I wanted to circle back to the summertime and decluttering. And one thing that you did mention, like I said, before we started recording was about you know, especially when we are in the summertime, and we’re wanting to try out new things. So what tips do you have for us if we’re wanting to try out camping or try out? I don’t know, some other fun activity during the summer? How can we try some things out without adding more things and more stuff to our hours. So

Deanna 22:41
there are a lot of ways that you can rent things before you buy like so for us. We tried paddleboarding. So during the pandemic, we couldn’t really do much, you know, and beaches were closed, but you could be out on the water. So we actually rented paddle boards, we tried it out, we made sure we all were gonna like it because we went kayaking one time when my daughter was really little, and she hated it. So we were nervous that we would get out there, and she wouldn’t like it. But yeah, she liked it. So we tried it out a few times. And then we decided to buy the paddleboard so that we had them. So we could go whenever we wanted. We didn’t have to worry about when things opened or getting there or whatever, right. So it’s that kind of a thing. You just want to make sure it’s something that you actually enjoy doing. Because anytime we take on new hobbies, there is always stuff that comes along with it. There is clutter creep, you get this thing and then you need this thing, right we got a paddleboard, well then we needed an extra paddle for my daughter, we needed a pump, we needed a life vest for her, we needed, you know, there’s all these little things, we needed a way to get them to the beach. So did we need a rack for the car will they fit in our trunk we got blow up on so they fit in our trunk. So it’s just kind of those things, all these little things can add up. So you just have to think about that when you’re starting a hobby if you actually have the bandwidth to take on all the periphery or the peripheral things that come with it. But also so other things you can try camping, you can generally rent an RV to go try camping to see if you like it before you really get into it. Obviously RV camping and tent camping are totally different. But you can try this stuff out. And I really would go back to that buy nothing group and see if you can borrow something. So sometimes people will let you borrow something, they’re not really willing to get rid of it themselves. They want they still want to have it but you can borrow. Another thing we’ve borrowed in the past are things like woodworking tools. So if you’ve ever thought like, Oh, I really want to build something, but I don’t have the table saw or the miter saw or or the you know all the things. Usually you can actually rent these things from a tool library at your local hardware store. And so that is a good way to try it too. Yes, it might feel a little more expensive at the beginning because it does cost a little bit to rent these things. But trust me as somebody who has tried lots of hobbies and I highly encourage to people to try hobbies because you don’t know what lights you up until you try it. It can be really expensive to go all in thinking this is something you really want to do. And then you turn out, oh, I didn’t end up liking that, right? Like, I wanted to be adult like I didn’t actually but like, say you wanted to try jewelry, or you want to do crochet or you know, you have hobbies, like that little bit more winter time, but they can, you can buy all this stuff. And then you’ve spent hundreds of dollars and you realize, oh, I don’t actually really like it that much. It’s not really that fun, right? Or baking or whatever it is. So if there’s a way that you can just try to be creative and see if there’s a way you can either start small, and just try a little bit or see if you can rent it before you actually buy all the big stuff.

Toni-Ann Mayembe 25:44
Nice, nice. No, I like all of that. And these by nothing are Yeah. Is it by nothing groups. Yeah, by nothing. Yeah, yeah, I definitely need to get in those.

Deanna 25:54
Okay, I just have to caution you though. It gets really like when you first jump in, you’re like, oh my gosh, these people are giving me all this nice stuff for free. So just temper, make sure you have an idea of what you really want. Sit on it before you say like, yes, me, me, me. Because trust me even myself as a minimalist and doesn’t who doesn’t like to shop doesn’t like to go out and get stuff? It’s so tempting to be like, Oh my gosh, that looks so cute. Or what they’re giving me that table? That’d be great. You know, but if you don’t have a place for it, and you don’t have a purpose for it, don’t try to get it. Okay.

Toni-Ann Mayembe 26:25
Thank you for that word of caution. Because you got me so excited. Because you said it a couple of times. I’m like, Where have I been living? I didn’t know nothing about these Buy Nothing groups like what is? Nice, nice. Well, Deanna, you’ve given us a lot of really great tips, I think we are ready to tackle this summertime hobby without getting extra clutter. So super excited that you gave us these, these tips and things to think about. So thank you for all of that. Now, before we signed off, I just wanted you to share either a word of encouragement or motivational quote, whatever it is that you have, for us real happy moms.

Deanna 27:04
Sure. So my word of encouragement I bet to actually I’m gonna give you one that is like a little sarcastic and a little like, just out there. I saw this earlier this week. It’s from Jerry Seinfeld. And he was doing a stand up routine. And he basically was talking about how everything that comes into your house is you are just a garbage recycling garbage center, right, because everything that comes in eventually will go to the landfill. It starts you know, really prominent, you’ve got it in your house on your table, like somewhere displayed. And then it just slowly gets put into a drawer and then it goes into the garage, and then eventually it goes into the dumpster. So just think about that when you bring things in your house. Sorry, that one’s a little, a little downer. And a little downer. But I want to encourage you that you can do anything you set your mind to you really can the world is your oyster. And if you really want to do it and you set the pieces in place. Anything is possible.

Toni-Ann Mayembe 28:10
Nice, nice. No. And that was not a downer. That was definitely something for me to think about. Because yeah, once he said that, I was like, Yeah, I won’t go crazy. When I go to Target today. I’ll be good. So thank you again, for coming on. Where can we find you online? If we want to connect with you learn more about you? Or get some more information or? Yeah, just shut them more from you.

Deanna 28:36
I’m pretty easy to find. So my website is want to be clutter. free.com I’m want to be clutter free on all the handles so Instagram, Facebook, Pinterest, you can find me there. And my podcast, like you said, is one of the minimalist.

Toni-Ann Mayembe 28:52
Perfect, perfect, and I’ll make sure to include all of the links in the show notes again. Thank you, Deanna again for coming on. And yeah, this is been a great one. So thank you. Thank you. Now that does it for this week’s episode of The Real happy mom podcast. I hope you’ve enjoyed it as much as me, I know that there were several links that were mentioned in this week’s episode. So head on over to Real happy mom.com/ 184 to get the links in the show notes. And do me a favor. Come back again next week for another full episode. Next week, we’re gonna be talking about some body comparison. This is one topic that can get a little less get here, but I’m sure that it is one that is going to be helpful for you. Especially as it gets warm, at least here in the northern hemisphere. It’s getting warm here and people are starting to wear a little bit smaller clothing. I want you to feel comfortable in your body and definitely want to have this conversation with you. So come back again next week for another full episode. Until then, take care and with lots of love

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